Sunday, October 01, 2006


By Ivan G. Goldman

Republicans in Congress have no energy policy, won't surrender to science on global warming, they undermine worker safety, poison our air and water, blow holes in the budget, and have no plan for Iraq or the rapidly deteriorating situation in Afghanistan beyond simplistic, meaningless slogans. They refuse to accept the Geneva Convention, and don't even make a peep about our disgraceful health care non-system.

But they do have a moral policy. Yes, and thousands of pastors agree that their Democratic opponents are immoral trash who, at the quickly approaching End of Times, will roast in everlasting patriotic fire that’s delicious to contemplate. Oddly enough, those same pastors will still agree that a vote for the GOP is a vote for virtue even after they’ve been informed that House Republicans covered up sexual crimes for years, staying a course that could have been designed by the North American Man Boy Love Association.

Rep. Foley’s explicit instant messaging is on its very face a felony. Even if he didn’t consummate the deal with the objects of his desire, attempted seduction of minors is a criminal offense. If a dirty old man cruises a schoolyard, tries to entice kids into his vehicle and then is scared off before he can reel one in, the law does not let him off. In fact, various police departments around the country have assigned detectives to pose as minors on the Internet, then arrested and convicted men for precisely the same pedophiliac practices that Foley left as evidence. And there’s no more Johnny Cochran to turn to.

Think what the mass media would do if, say, Democrat Nancy Pelosi had joined a sexual-crime conspiracy and then continued passing around campaign funds connected to its principal offender. The Republican leaders will suffer a more limited media assault by comparison, but it’s difficult to see how Hastert and Company can slither away. Individuals aware of an ongoing crime who refuse to report it can be brought to justice as part of a conspiracy. Their best hope is that they are being investigated by the already-compromised FBI, a vassal of torture-happy Attorney General Gonzalez.

Meanwhile, the White House is cracking apart – one revelation after another. It’s like turning on the light and seeing a billion cockroaches running off in different directions. Recently we discovered, for example, that the White House threw a billion dollars in tax money at golf buddies to put together a national reading program for children based on disproved crackpot ravings. It this was an Administration of grown-ups, the story would get play. But reporters faced with this corrupt gang of lying, maniacal bullies are stymied. Where to begin? Nobody asks the Hell's Angels how they handle their dues. Besides, when someone's burning up $6 billion a year in the pointlessness of Iraq, it feels small to look at details. People are dying, empires falling, and we just wriggled out of the Geneva Convention to provide cover for the war crimes of Prince George and his civilian baronets.

This time the Republicans may not be able to steal enough votes, and if they can’t, look out for investigations, subpoenas, indictments, and cornered criminals lining up to squeal on each other. Because after all, ratting each other out is the moral thing to do.

1 comment:

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